Because the Sara Bareilles song is on every commercial that I can’t fast forward through, or on every mall speaker system, and because the popularity of the sad-bastard music of the Plain White T’s means I have the whole tune memorized without ever having intentionally listened to Delilah, I made this song. Here’s to you, lovers of sappy men/strong-yet-weepy-woman music:

Plain White T’s:
Hey there, Bareilles
What’s it like in New York City?
I’m a thousand miles away, but girl tonight you look so pretty

Sara Bareilles:
Ah..do i? Well…I’m not gonna write you a love song!
Cause you asked for it, cause you need one, you see

PWT:
Yes…yes, I do
I can’t seem to write, just like you
I swear it’s true

SB:
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you a love song, today! But you’re far away.

PWT:
Don’t you worry about the distance
A thousand miles seems pretty far
But they’ve got gmail, cells and cars

SB:
If you’re on your way, I’m not gonna write unless you stay

PWT:
Hey there, Bareilles, what’s it like to write a love song?
I know that you’ve tried not to, but this one is getting tired
yes it’s true
And it’s not even about you. Whoo woo woo

Both:
By the time we get through
The world will never ever be the same
And we’re to blame

It’s true. We swear it’s true.

If your ears are bleeding right now, I’m sorry.