The problem with Top Ten lists is that you can’t know for sure how much music the dude (or dudette) offering the list actually listened to for the year. Sometimes this makes no difference. Like when Rolling Stone or Spin writers put together their best-of lists, after having had every CD made sent to them to listen to for free, and they still find a way to put that goddamned Arctic Monkeys CD among the ranks. But, there are actual reputable publications, online and in print, that put together some pretty kick-ass lists, and I trust them because they probably actually heard the whole Black Lips disc. I have not.

I don’t get free CDs, and I bought a crap house this year. So I’m poor, and I couldn’t analyze every disc released this year. Because I don’t have that kind of money. And, honestly, I haven’t heard any of the Lily Allen CD, because I get the feeling that I don’t give a crap about Lily Allen.

So, yes, this is a Top Ten list. But it’s the top ten of music I actually listen to, and spent money on. And I live in Bismarck, N.D., so it’s not as obscure a list as it can be, because it’s only CDs that I can find at Best Buy, because that’s my only option. And, yes, most of it has been previously published in a newspaper. This is because I am lazy, so I’m not going to write two different lists for two different places. And the paper kind of feeds my kids (that’s my nickname for my teeth), so they get first priority. But, hey, I sprinkled some swear words into this version. Fun!

Might as well jump.

The List to End All Lists: 

10) Iron & Wine, “The Shepherd’s Dog”

Why is it that we can make baby blankets so incredibly soft, but adult blankets are kind of scratchy and rough, in comparison? I was shopping for a Christmas present for my godchild, Katarina, at midnight in Wal-Mart earlier this month, rubbing my face against these baby blankets, only to then realize that I was rubbing my face against blankets at Wal-Mart at midnight. But still, the question remains. How do they get so soft?

Anyway, Iron & Wine is like a baby blanket. “Shepherd’s Dog” is no exception.

9) Band of Horses, “Cease to Begin”

I love “Cease to Begin” for three important reasons. First, beards are pretty bitchin’, and this is a beard-heavy band. Grow a beard. Second, “Is There A Ghost” is the catchiest song with only 14 words to its credit since Pearl Jam’s “Smile,” and it’s comforting to know that I’m not the only one losing sleep over the possibility of ghosts in his house. Finally, they named a slow jam after former NBA Sixth Man of the Year Detlef Schrempf, and the song is just as soft and sweet as the Grand Teuton’s touch from outside the three-point line.

Maybe you think I just listed four reasons. Technically, the second reason is two sub-reasons, combined into one greater cause.

The White Stripes, “Icky Thump”

The Stripes were supposed to play a show in Fargo, but it got canceled. Taking away the bitter emptiness this disappointment has left me with, the band’s latest album was anything but disappointing. It’s as fun of a romp as any of the albums the band released in their first 10 years, and it proves that even the simplest of formulas can stay as fresh as a Twinkee, a decade later.

7)Bloc Party, “Weekend in the City”

Call this one the after-party. After a truly staggering rookie release of high-octane, post-punk rock eruption on “Silent Alarm,”Bloc Party take it down a notch for their sophomore effort, “Weekend in the City.” If their first album was a trip to the club, their newest follows you home, delving into your quiet, desperate moments away from the nightlife. It’s a thoughtful release, and proof this band isn’t content to hit the same note, over and over.

6) The Weakerthans, “Reunion Tour”

Maybe it’s my experiences as a new pet owner, but I get a little misty-eyed during one moment of the song “Virtute the Cat Explains Her Departure.” The story of a cat who has run away, the song slowly builds to a wall of guitar and Virtute, the narrator, exclaiming she can no longer “remember the sound that you found for me,” in the most powerful moment on any song in any album on this list. Gets me every time. I just want to hug my dog.

5) Shout Out Louds, “Our Ill Wills”

Say what you will about Sweden (with their high taxes and doctrine of neutrality in wartime), but they sure can bend their heads around a decent pop tune. Like an ABBA for the indie set, the Shout Out Louds combine lyrics about being rejected by girls with sugary pop instrumentation. Nothing takes the sting out of love lost like a xylophone. The album’s best moment is the song “Impossible,”is the finest tune that the Cure never wrote (and now, I’m sorry to say, it’s too late to do so, and suck on that, Bobby Smith).

4) Kings of Leon, “Because of the Times”

Read any press on these guys, and you’ll know that three out of four members of this band were raised by a Southern preacher. And this album could pass as a religious experience. One minute, they bring the boogie, like a congregation rockin’ the house that Jesus built, then they’ll slow it down, preaching directly to the choir with some slow, soft love for the big dude in the sky. In terms of pure, raw rock expression, this album is probably the best example of the year for how rock ‘n’ roll should feel.

3) Spoon, “Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga”

The unconventional kings of indie rock and soul, Spoon just can’t seem to do wrong in this world. There’s not a sour note on this album with a ridiculous name (Seriously, how am I supposed to talk about this album with friends? Hey, what albums did you like this year? they’ll ask, and “Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga,” I’m supposed to say? They’ll think I’m choking on a chicken bone). The horn section on “The Underdog” is the best use of brass on a pop single since Beyonce did it, but there’s guitar on this, so you don’t have to feel dirty for liking it. “My Little Japanese Cigarette Case” is the catchiest 18-word song since Band of Horses’ “Is There A Ghost.” And the echo-chamber rhythm of “You Got Yr. Cherry Bomb” stands at the peak of an album that never fails to make me flinch with pangs of delight. I only wish the disc was longer.

2) Radiohead, “In Rainbows”

I feel a little bit guilty for only ranking this album at the No. 2 spot. Yes, the album was officially released on the Internet long before it will actually hit stores. Yes, fans could choose how much they wanted to pay (or not pay, which I’m sure most of us did) for the right to acquire the music. Yes, Radiohead probably deserve the top spot just for being so commercially bold. Also, they likely merit the top for having finally found the right blend of the electric eccentrics of their later albums with the guitar pop of their earlier albums. “In Rainbows”is slow and startling in its smooth edges. Every track will slide through you slowly, like a painkiller working its way through your veins. It’s a defining moment from a band that’s already defined a whole musical generation. It deserves to be at the top of any list.

1) The National, “Boxer”

With apologies to Radiohead, there’s just no getting around the National’s “Boxer.”

We are all people, and we’ve all spent our fair share of time alone, and we all know the reflective thoughts that flood into an idle mind. The National’s lead singer and lyricist Matt Berninger catches these thoughts and feelings like lightning bugs in a jar, placing them so perfectly on display with his smoky baritone. Ringing guitars, accordions, string sections and an awe-inspiringly great drummer blend together and create a sad, fragile and flawlessly vivid landscape behind every word. Each song is a masterpiece to itself, tacked together like 12 Van Gogh masterpieces hanging on a single wall.

This is where I would have put in a joke about not having to chop off one’s ear while listening to the National. But you would have seen that coming, so I just said no.

And, now, some bonus features. Oh, it’s just like a DVD.

Disappointments of the year:

1) The Shins, “Wincing the Night Away”

What the hell happened? Could it be because the band is becoming sort of popular and, just like a Harry Potter book, I don’t want to share my interests with suburban housewives? Or is because this album just kind of blows? The world may never know.

2) Ted Leo and the Pharmacists, “Living With the Living”

Last year, at this time, I thought for sure this disc was going to be on my top ten. How could it not? And then it comes out and — don’t get me wrong — it’s OK. But it’s not shaking the sheets, if you know what I’m saying. Hell, the best song on the album, “Old Souls Know,” isn’t even on the goddamned album. It’s on the bonus ep, along with a kickass Chumbawumba cover (never thought I’d find reason to put together a more ridiculous three-word phrase than that one), so it doesn’t count. Also, “Bomb. Repeat. Bomb.” is a shitty song, and an even shittier single. C’mon, Ted.

However, Ted Leo was the best concert I saw this year. Holy crap, that band can bring it.

Boof’s pick for Album of the Year:

Yes, my dog likes music. Just look into his eyes. That’s a sensitive soul, there. Anyway, he’s going to go with Daughtry’s debut disc, “Daughtry.” Boof just loves the “American Idol,” and he can’t get enough of this bald bastard’s brand of the rock music. Boof absolutely loves it when Daughtry stretches that voice of his into the upper atmosphere, emoting like a sensitive biker, or whatever it is that he’s trying to sound like. Boof likes heavy metal, but he doesn’t like it when it’s too heavy, nor metal, so this Nerf rock genre of music works pretty well for him. Boof loves this album.

Boof also enjoys plunging his nose directly into piles of other dogs’ piss that he finds in the snow on our walks, too. This should be noted.

 The Rapture:

So this is the end of the list. I suppose I could list favorite songs of the year like my compatriots did, but I’m tired of looking at this thing. Also, I’m more of a big-picture guy, and if you’re producing good songs but not good albums, you don’t deserve my love, Rihanna. If 2007 was any indicator, 2008 should be filled with all kinds of good music that I won’t be able to afford to buy. Merry Christmas!