According to the BBC, a spider has forced a family to move out of their home.

Spider forces family out of home

A soldier’s family have been frightened out of their home by a spider thought to have been brought to Essex from Afghanistan in a kitbag.

Lorraine Griffiths and her three children have moved out of their house in Colchester, the RSPCA said.

They are refusing to return until the large sandy-coloured creature, thought to be a camel spider, is captured.

An RSPCA spokeswoman confirmed they had visited the house but failed to locate the creature.
“If it is the spider they believe it is, then normally they don’t attack humans, but they could give a painful bite,” the spokeswoman said.

Mrs Griffiths believes the spider got to the UK in a kitbag brought home in June by her husband, Rodney, 32, when he returned from Afghanistan.

He is now back there on a further tour of duty.

She said the spider was seen in her bedroom by her two elder children, aged 18 and 16, and an electrician working at their home.

“They identified the spider using the internet,” she said.

Well, now, I have to say that this is completely absurd. They identified the spider using the Internet? Are you mad? How can an arachnid use the Internet? They don’t have the proper cognitive abilities to operate such a complicated device, and furthermore, how would they even turn the computer on in the first place? They are far too small a creature to do any such thing. How the BBC can print such nonsense with a straight face I will never understand, and beyond that … Oh, dear Lord. Somebody’s com

BOAEFOTW4 35•

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Holy crap, you should’ve seen the size of that spider I just smashed on my keyboard. It was frigging huge.

Wait, what’s this? Somebody wrote me a free blog entry! Hooray!