What is the size of your rolls of sod?
Er…we actually don’t sell sod. We’re a Sod Blog, not a sod store. Two entirely different things.
How many square feet per pallet?
Look, you’re operating under a misconception. We have no sod to speak of.
Then what is this Sod of which you speak?
Sod is us. We are Sod. Sod is what we write. Sod is what we believe in. Sod has been good to us, and we, in turn, are good to Sod. All glory be given to Sod.
Does Sod stand for anything?
Oh, we stand for lots of things. Like the implantation of a Fair Tax system and insisting that people never, ever kick small dogs, no matter how puntable they may be.
May I order any amount of sod?
Again, we are not selling sod. It is just our name.
If Sod Blog was a tree of some sort, what kind of tree would it be?
Probably maple.
So what should a person expect to read at this Sod Blog?
On any given day, you can read snark-filled posts on a variety of subjects, such as politics, or entertainment, reviews of music and movies and video games, or just general slice-of-life posts on subjects such as the Dodge Stratus that really pissed us off this morning when it cut into the lane right in front of us for no good reason, even though he had no need to do so as he wasn’t turning and just seemed to do it because he was a complete goddamn idiot who does goddamn idiot things just for the hell of it, and he was lucky we were already late for work or else we would have gladly tailed him until he arrived at his destination, and then approached him as he got out of his car and beaten him to death with a tire iron. Seriously, what the hell was that guy’s problem? Asshole.
Is your sod available at any retail locations?
How many times are we going to have to go over this?
Who is responsible for this Sod Blog?
The Sod Blog is owned and operated by the mysterious Admin Istrator, whose identity is a closely guarded secret, as he is a ninja. Since maintaining a website and sneaking up on people in the shadows to break their necks is a full-time gig, writing duties are overseen by Erik Hagen, who is also like a ninja in that he wears black clothing a lot and isn’t much of a talker, but he lacks any awesome abilities.
How may I participate in this Sod Blog?
We like comments. If you write us some and we notice them, we might shove them past the spam filter and maybe even respond to them, most likely with certain allusions to your intelligence or lack thereof. Nothing personal, we just dislike society and everyone who participates in it.
When is the best time to install sod?
…
I’ve read something on Sod Blog which I find horribly offensive. Who do I write to in order to complain?
At Sod Blog, we take the satisfaction of all of our readers very seriously, and we are completely dedicated towards hearing any grievances anyone would have with the work we put forward. You may send all complaints about Sod Blog content to idontcareaboutyouropinions@hotmail.com. If you don’t get the joke, it’s that it’s a Hotmail address.
What preparation do I need to do before delivery of sod?
Okay, that does it. Seriously. Just go to hell.
